Issue: Irredeemable #13
Release Date: May 5, 2010
Creator/Writer: Mark Waid
Artist: Diego Barreto
Colorist: Andrew Dalhouse
Cover(s): Paul Azaceta with Andrew Dalhouse, Chriscross with Andrew Dalhouse, Chriscross
Letterer: Ed Dukeshire
Publisher: BOOM! Comics
Bette Noir fills us (and her father) in on what was going down with her and the Paradigm the day Plutonian blew Sky City into, well, the sky. Bring on the emo!
As stated, this issue is full of Bette being emo and telling her father what went down the day Tony (is it “The Plutonian” or just “Plutonian” because I’ve seen it both ways) flipped his lid. I think she was looking for her dad to tell her she’s not as bad a person as she keeps harping on about and that everything will be alright, which, thankfully, he doesn’t do.
So what we do find out from Bette’s version of the story is that apparently every super-powered dude in the Paradigm wants to bang her like a kettle drum (she and Volt actually have time to banter about how he wants in her pants while they’re trying to take down a baddie), she doesn’t immediately tell anyone about the special candle that pulls a Samson and Delilah on Tony because none of them actually think it’s really Tony killing everyone, and then when they do find out it really is him she threatens him with it, but doesn’t bother telling her husband what she’s talking about when he asks her about it.
And then her dad tells her to get out of his face and man the hell up and do something besides bitch and whine already.
Okay, maybe not in those exact words, but that’s about the gist of what goes down between Bette and Dad. I’m with him, in that regard. I’m super tired of Bette being all emo and “OH GAWD, I’M A HORRIBLE VILLAIN! DON’T YOU HATE ME? No, seriously, I need you to hate me because I feel like a total slag” because that’s not getting super boring to read about every issue or anything. A few issues back I was saying how I don’t get why she thinks she’s a murderer and, I’ll be honest, I still don’t get it. I mean, her major crime seems to be that she smacks a little of Mary Sue and that she’s a total and complete whiner. When it comes down to it, yeah, if she would have spoken up right away about the candle when Gilgamos questioned her about it, millions could have possibly been saved — there’s no guarantee that the little bit of wax she stole could have amounted to a whole hell of beans. However, she just saw the world’s greatest hero, a man she obviously carried a torch in some fashion for, someone who was a beacon of hope and all that feel good stuff wipe out an entire city and melt the flesh of a gymnasium full of children AND blow past his former teammates like they were standing still all without batting an eye. I think a certain amount of “my brain just broke” shock is not only expected but kind of called for, and she and everyone on the planet are all probably trying to deal with PTSD on some level because of all this.
Depending on how many days or months have passed since that initial event, yeah, she should have at some point brought the subject of the candle wax back up. Normally, I’d say we don’t know that she’s still not in shock because that’s different for everyone (not to mention the PTSD that I would expect anyone in a situation like the one posed here would develop, again, on some level), but she’s seemed fairly coherent and together in her “I need the attention back on me” wailings of how she’s a villain. I’d feel bad for her if it didn’t seem to me the only reason she never brought it back up again was that she was ashamed of her tryst with Tony. Which doesn’t make a lick of sense since she took Tony for a ride before she and Gilgamos were even seriously dating, let alone married. I just don’t get where this is going with her.
The last page of this issue, though? Whoa. Totally saved the issue for me and brought my interest back around. Also, I really am liking that cover (it’s cover B). I would love that as a poster because as much of a bastard Tony is, I am totally digging him. I’ll admit it. I am very intrigued by that character and the idea of a “superman” going all fearmonger on the planet. So much so, that I had to buy the body oil BPAL created that was inspired by him (totally worth the money and trouble of finding a BPAL seller).
Rating: 2.5 / 5 Stars